Dr_bob’s Bluffers guide to cult(ish) films #1

dr bob watches those cult films so you don’t have to

In this "every second counts mad rush workaday world" you really don’t have time to watch those zany b-movies you've been meaning to.
The problem though is that you miss out on being able to take part in drunken pub conversations about those selfsame zany b-movies, which to be honest is the only reason people watch them anyway (well except for me but I’m a lost cause as you all know).Well weep no longer gentle interwebsurfer for dr_bob is here....I’ve watched these pieces of cr.....er I mean classics and am synopsising them for you here at retro-metro so that soon you'll be able to bullshit your friends ad nauseum down the boozer and take part in exciting debates on cult films that none of you have actually seen...ye bunch of sad tossers!
Freed from the chore of actually watching them you can return honorable persuits such as blackmailing twink,sending anonymous threatening letters to Peter Collins and watching "when lawyers attack" and " botched celebrity operations II" on tv3.
I've knocked up a list of about thirty , heres the first two (and actually quite good they are too , so I've included links to get them at play.com if ye like)
Anyways, on with the show;

the thing
who's in it: Kurt Russell , some B-movie actors , and a lot of special effects
whats it about: well , its a remake of a 1950's film called "the thing from another world", which in turn was based on a 50's scifi short story . Its about a parasitic shape changing alien taking control of an arctic research station and knocking off the crew one by one.As the cast list diminishes no-one knows whether the person next to them is a friend or the alien. Its a very taut film ,with noone able to trust anyone else , its no surprise that the original story was called "who goes there" .Its also a very very gory movie..at one point while doing an autopsy on a crewmate , a doctors hands are "bitten" off as the thing takes control of the body and causes the chest cavity he's working on to sprout teeth, the head then separates and grows legs ,before scampering off...its that kind of film. Its also one of the few horror films I know of with a completely male cast, don’t know if this is a good thing or not , but the film works..
quotes: er.."arrgh my hands??"
well its not that kind of film, but things to mention would be .
the aforementioned hand->chest->stump bit,
the ambiguity of the ending (two castmembers left at the end either of them is the thing , or quite possibly both are , it leaves it up to you to decide),
the fact that it got killed by another "alien" at the box office , as it opened against ET,
that the special effects guy behind all that gore had to check himself into a hospital afterwards with exhaustion,
and that there was a Ps2/pc game released of the thing last year(dr_bob, always with the games..:) )

The princess bride
who's in it::ahh lots of famous actors , the guy from the rocketeer, one of the blokes from spinal tap, columbo, and ...er Andre the giant
whats it about:this description (I think it was taken from a poster) sums it up perfectly
"A classic fairy tale, with swordplay, giants, an evil king, a beautiful princess, and yes, some kissing (as read by a kindly grandfather)."
Its pretty much all that , as its a story within a story , where a grandfather (peter falk) is reading a story to his sick grandson (hence the bit about the kissing as he's 12 and not too fond of the mushy stuff ).The plot then switches to a well amalgam of every , fairy, magic,pirate, revenge, mistaken identity story you've ever read,only better.
I think the film is revered so much as while not taking itself too seriously , it still treats the characters with enough respect that you actually care what happens to them .That and the fact its got andre the giant in it...oh and they keep the kissing to a minimum too :)
quotes
"Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya - you killed my father, prepare to die""
"Vizzini: You only think I guessed wrong - that's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha-ha, you fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders, the most famous of which is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia", but only slightly less well known is this: "Never go in against a Sicilian, when *death* is on the line!". Hahahahahah!
[Vizzini falls over dead] "
"Westley: As you wish." (the ladies like this one )ahh screw it loads more quotes here
any handy facts
theres a bit where the princess is rolling down a hill , where its plainly a burly bearded stuntman
Bits of the film were filmed in Ireland
this is "sleepy the dwarf"'s favourite film
The region two dvd version is shite